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Coolness is about confidence. The more of it you have, the more alluring and mysterious you'll be. This is a good thing.
To a by-stander, confident people consistently deliver surprise and shock without embarrassment, which is why it's so hard to imitate. Learning confidence might be very fluid to some, but usually it's very difficult for the masses.
Everyone is confident about some topic in their life; that's natural. Difficulties arise because a cool student in training can't always transfer confidence to another dimension of their being.
The journey to confidence is a personal one. Getting experience means you'll get some pie in your face. It's worth it.
It could also be said that confidence is about making other people feel secure about themselves in the way they look, feel and act. Here is a small road map on places you never want to go:
This failed attempt at coolness always starts with "It seemed like a good idea at the time." There is simple emotion arc to cockiness:
Story time: A dude wears sweat pants, no underwear, to the mall. He's dumbfounded when he sports a boner and he can't talk loud enough to distract every one from scoping out his pup-tent. Don't exhibit something you're not fully proud of. Not being proud about actions is a flag of cockiness.
The female angle would be wrapping a wonderful pair of breasts in a tight white t-shirt -with no bra. She struts her melons around town, except it's getting cold and now she's advertising the size of her nipples as quarter-sized and kind of pointy. Sadly, she's not confident enough to stand up to non-stop male oogling. She was being cocky, not fully proud of her cleavage, it led to her fail.
Arrogance: weak, if any, reasons for atypical behavior, typically with a pushy flair to them. Typically, arrogant minds can't defend their trashy choices in life and are way way too proud about obvious stupidity. The arrogant will routinely justify their selfish ways based on (sometimes fictional) power/rank. Don't do this.
If you have a one-track mind, or if you automatically consider yourself right, if you don't listen to reasonable analysis, if you laugh real fast at your own jokes... you are arrogant and uncool.
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